I received your letter last week and quite enjoyed hearing from you. Nowadays reading letters from home is the only reminder of the life I once had. I am sorry that it has taken be so long to write back. I barely have time to sleep around here. I guess that’s all for the better though because it means that I don’t have the opportunity to think about what I must be missing. Sometimes I feel as though I will never return home, even though I haven’t been gone long.
I suppose you’ve already heard the tragic news of Kemmerich’s fate. That is one of my greatest hardships, for he doesn’t know he has lost a leg. It is but a great relief that I know those around me, for now. However, you needn’t worry about me mother; I have become a machine. I do everything I am told and rely on my instincts. It is interesting to think that I was once such a free-spirited individual, now I wait for orders and do only what my commanding officers tell me to.
You must tell Kantorek that I learned more from a month on the front than I did throughout his whole class. I believe he should have come to experience this also. Life is so different out here. I realize now how lucky I am, because the conditions are so different. Believe me mother, when I return I promise you will find me to be a man. However, I must confess that I don’t know if it is for the better. I wish I could go back to the lifestyle of writing poetry and observing nature while in good company.
Love to all,
Paul
I have been through a lot during my short time in war, but I do believe that this peom is a great representation of what I have gone through.
Change is a myriad of colors,
Red for its passion; black for its sorrow.
It sounds like the wailing wrath of the wind,
Getting closer and closer 'til it comes again.
It tastes like a grapefruit, fresh and ripe.
It can bring grief or the brightest of lights.
Its scent is subtle, like that of a flower,
Creeping upon you like a sudden spring shower.
Change looks like a stranger on the street,
Ever so near and always discreet.
Sometimes change can cause great fear,
But can also bring hope for future years.
Copyright © 2004 by Shana Wilson
In the first chapter of the novel, Paul is faced with many opportunities for change and seems to always wind up regretting it. The poem features the line “It tastes like a grapefruit, fresh and ripe, It can bring grief or the brightest of lights” which explains the temptation of change and risk that goes along with it. Paul is first excited about change because he has never had any big altercations in his lifestyle before, and knows that it is a risk but is blinded by excitement. Similarly, the poem features the line “But can also bring hope for future years” which is the only thing Paul has in mind has he is convinced to enlist in the army. Paul, who is essentially an optimistic fellow, has his mind on the positive outcome. He must eventually learn to consider risks both ways, and thus be introduced to reality, a place where anything is possible.
Art Connection-
http://www.global-b2b-network.com/b2b/44/970/page5/47317/abstract_painting.html
In the first chapter of this novel, Paul receives a dose of reality as moves into adulthood with a whirlwind of life-altering changes. This painting inhibits colors such as red, black/grey, orange, white, yellow, and pink, which all help to express Paul’s mood. As an adolescent, Paul has always trusted his elders and is now learning that he must think for himself, therefore he is confused. Additionally, this painting shows those colors blended together with little cubes on top of them. This detail represents the fact that Paul’s gentle and poetic nature is becoming watered down by the structured conformism of the German army. Paul is beginning to lose his sense of self in the hierarchy of the German army.
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